dang girl are you my appendix because I don’t understand how you work but this feeling in my stomach makes me want to take you out
That is quite possibly the weirdest and most carefully thought out pickup line I’ve ever read. I applaud you.
a true fact about spiders is they can’t run for extended periods of time because they have asthma. all spiders are nerds. even tarantulas. have you ever seen a spider dating a hot babe? i doubt it. spider flashing his cash in the club? nope. spider pulling up beside you at the lights in a lamborghini? never happened. they’ve got so many eyes because they love reading. nerds. all of them.
lets be real guys if theres ever a zombie apocalypse do you even know how many white girls are gonna try and find a zombie boyfriend like in Warm Bodies
probably literally none holy shit did you really think adding “white” in front of that would really mask that you literally just said “girls are so desperate for a boyfriend they’ll try to fuck half-decomposed, ravenous, CORPSES” wtf even is that